Classic Horrors Club

Welcome back to another month of “April Fools!” After unintentionally launching a month-long theme last year at this time, I’ve located four more horror spoofs that came in the wake of the Slasher phenomenon of the 1980s. Student Bodies (1981) set the high bar, but we’ll see if any of the films this month come close to it. Sadly, but not surprisingly, Class Reunion (1982)  doesn’t do it.

After the success of National Lampoon’s Animal House in 1978, members of the original National Lampoon magazine had an opportunity to launch a comedy franchise of heretofore unknown proportions. Instead, they gave us a movie with the potentially misleading title National Lampoon’s Class Reunion. I can’t find evidence of this, but it’s so unfunny I imagine National Lampoon wanted its name removed. Today it’s known simply as Class Reunion.

Actually, I learned that during the 1980s and 90s, the name “National Lampoon” could be licensed and slapped onto anything… for a fee. Looking back on that era, two other movies dropped the leading part of the title: Movie Madness (1982, but actually made before Class Reunion) and Joy of Sex (1984.) Of course, had they been successes, all three would proudly wear the name of a franchise.

The most shocking thing about Class Reunion is that it was written by John Hughes (Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.) I’ve read two things about this. One is that it his excuse is that it was his first full-length script. The other is that it was rewritten to barely resemble his original script and he’s disowned it. Either way, he’s right to distance himself. I guess it’s too late to slap an Alan J. Smithee on it.

The oddest thing about Class Reunion is that it’s watchable at all. It held my attention and was perfectly paced for its 84-minute running time. I appreciated the fun, but not original (even to the slasher spoofs) concept. A high school student is duped into making out with his twin sister during the senior party. Mentally scarred, he returns ten years later to stalk and kill them one by one at… the class reunion,.

The movie is littered with clever ideas, but not one of them bears any comedic fruit. For example, the action takes place at Lizzie Borden High School: a Cut Above the Rest. Also, when the killer, who I like to call “Baghead” because he wears a paper bag over his head, grabs the obligatory chainsaw, he raises it over his head like Leatherface. Then nothing happens… freeze-frame and on to the next humorless bit.

The second oddest thing about Class Reunion is that providing the music for the dance in the gymnasium is Chuck Berry. Yes, the real Chuck Berry. Instead of any mystery in the plot, I want to investigate how in the world he became involved in this. Not as out of place is the theme song by Gary “U.S” Bonds, a peppy tune that evokes Lindsey Buckingham’s “Holiday Road” from National Lampoon’s Vacation the next year. 

Some more recognizable stars may have helped, but I bet they steered clear. The best we get is Flounder from Animal House and Beef from Phantom of the Paradise. Michael Lerner fares OK, which isn’t really much better, as Dr. Robert Young, a reference to a name most people probably won’t understand. The one smile I experienced in Class Reunion was when he announced himself.