Classic Horrors Club

The running time for The Unliving (2004) aka Tomb of the Werewolf is 95 minutes; however, if you fast forward through what Wikipedia calls “adult sex scenes bordering on softcore pornography,” you can watch it in, I’m estimating, no longer than 75 minutes. First, if these scenes “border” on soft core, what does it take to be soft core? Second, while these scenes seem odd for a Waldemar Daninsky werewolf film starring Paul Naschy, there’s a perfectly good reason… if you believe writer/director Fred Olen Ray.

In a bonus feature on the Makeflix Blu-ray release, A Werewolf in Hollywood, Ray was displeased with a shot, causing him to ponder questions like, “Is there a market for this?” and “Did I make a mistake?”

That’s why there’s a ton of tits and ass.

This bonus feature resembles a home movie, with Ray mixing cocktails at home and watching his toddler play with the buried remains of Waldemar Daninsky created for the movie by John Carl Buechler. Ray is depicted as somewhat of a slob, walking around the house with his shirt open and talking bad about the Spanish horror legend that was headlining his film. When Naschy complained that his makeup was itchy, Ray asked what he expected.

Hell yeah, it’s gonna be itchy.

Tomb of the Werewolf was one of two movies Naschy made in a week during a trip to California. The other was Countess Dracula’s Orgy of Blood, written and directed by another monster kid/filmmaker adult, Donald F. Glut. At nearly 70-years-old, Naschy was not necessarily in poor health; however, he did have a sore throat during filming. Plus, he carried the additional weight of an older man, limiting his physical movement while playing the werewolf. Ray seemed shocked when he asked for a stunt double.

Naschy had never learned to speak English, so his driver, Carlos, acted as interpreter. In the big picture, this doesn’t surprise me, but he even failed to understand the tiniest bit of the language. The only time A Werewolf in Hollywood showed any joy or love that Ray had for Naschy was in the beginning when he said he really wanted to hear him speak in English. Sure enough, there’s a brief moment of dialogue where he does.

We’re not here to talk about the bonus features, though. If you remove the softcore scenes, I kind of enjoyed The Unliving. Plotwise, if you think of Naschy’s Daninsky’s films from the 70s and 80s, then add 20 years, it sort of fits into the series. Elizabeth Bathory (Michelle Bauer) opens the film, but this time she’s the one who’s cursed. To retain her youth and beauty, she must bathe regularly in blood. That means she must kill the naked girl tied to a tree instead of present her as a gift to her master, Lucifer (Brian Carrillo.)

Fast forward to the modern-day Daninsky, Richard (John Henry Richardson.) He’s the last in the family line and has just inherited a castle in Europe that supposedly hides a fortune in treasure. He hires the cast and crew of a television reality show, Current Mysteries, to accompany him and document the search for, and hopeful discovery of, the treasure. It’s a horny bunch of young adults. Melanie (Danielle Petty), the host of the show, and Tony (Eddie Jay), the producer, get it on. Christie (Jacy Andrews) and Leslie (Beverly Lynne) get it on. One of those women, I don’t know which, and Steve (Frankie Cullen) get it on. One of those women, I don’t care which, and Elizabeth Bathory get in on.

Even a sexy young couple from the village get it on, but this time it’s tangentially related to the story; it’s so that they can be killed by the werewolf. You see, Waldemar Daninsky was raised from his tomb in the crypt by his ancestor when Elizabeth hypnotized him to remove the treasure: the silver cross which killed Waldemar in a flashback, depicted in the big book of family history Richard brought along for a little light reading. He was killed in the past, not by his true love, Eleanor (Stephanie Bentley), which breaks the rules of a Naschy werewolf movie. Nevertheless, Eleanor has returned in the present as a ghost (?) named Amanda, and you can expect the rules to eventually be followed.

Shot on video, it looks like a soap opera, and the best parts of the story did evoke Dark Shadows for me. I’ll give Ray credit for hiding his budgetary constraints, though. Instead of seeing the huge interior of the castle itself, we see only a bird’s eye view of the characters arriving and looking around as they “ooh” and “ah.” Also, to be honest, I liked the werewolf makeup better than some of the earlier versions. It’s basically just regular makeup on Naschy’s face with a hairy “hood” over his head, but it blends better than what we’ve seen in the past.

I’m surprised I didn’t outright hate The Unliving. I think it would be fun to edit out the sex and let the story play on its own. Those scenes serve no purpose, even for character development. The smoldering attractiveness of the characters speaks on its own without them removing their clothes. Finally, this is not just a cameo for Naschy; he plays as big a part as he ever did. He, really, is the only reason to watch this.

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